backwoods bibliophile

Feliz Compleanos Mamasita!

2007-01-04T16:24:00.000-08:00

Ila's first movie!

For you;

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please
And to a man
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees
Then they swarm around me
A hive of honey bees.
I say
It's the fire in my eyes
And the flash of my teeth
The swing of my waist
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say
It's in the arch of my back
The sun of my smile
The ride of my breasts
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say
It's in the click of my heels
The bend of my hair
The palm of my hand
The need for my care.
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

To music!

WHEN YOU HAVE A MOTHER.

When you have a mother
who cares so much for you
that anything you want
becomes her desires
When you have a mother
who is so understanding that
no matter what is bothering you
she can make you smile
When you have a mother
who is so strong that
no matter what obstacles she faces
she is always confident in front of you
When you have a mother
who actively pursues her goals in life
but includes you in all her goals
you are very lucky indeed
Having a mother like this
makes it easy to grow up
into a loving, strong adult
Thank you for being this kind
of wonderful mother.

~Susan P Schutz~

Happy Birthday You,
from the familia

Great words from a great woman-Lee Maracle

2006-12-20T14:23:00.000-08:00

I searched for a Lee Maracle website but found none. I did find an amazing essay on Christopher Columbus which I will post over on my other site.
From I Am Woman-A Native Perspective on Sociology and Feminism

I want to heal your spirit and...awaken that which keeps trying to come alive in you. I can see it under the veneer you have covered it with. I can feel it in your rage and in your meaness at all times. I can see it in the sadness on your face. The heartache written there was not put there by me or you. It is maintained by your succumbing to it.

Reflections From The Summit

I am not a rose in your lapel
I am an annoying dandelion.
Useful to you
should you want to bring
love to your community.

I am useless to a middle-class aspirant.
Harmful to someone who wants to live
above the poverty line,
enjoy luncheons on Friday
and dine out twice monthly.

I subtract
from your ability
to vacation once per annum.
I stand in the way of your need
to be only half there.

I am an asset to the man
who seeks liberation
from the death colonialism is.
Valuable to a man
who seeks escape
from the lonely castles built for the elite.

I am passion,
bright red and turbulent,
vehemently cutting a swath
through this brick, steel
and concrete tundra.

I am compassion,
soft, warm and winsome,
pleadingly coaxing gentleness
from the burning anger
of your spirit.

Lee Maracle , 1950-

Metis

Lee Maracle was born in 1950 and raised in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada. After dropping out of school to join the hippie subculture and to work as a political activist, she attended Simon Fraser University. Besides being a professor at the University of Toronto, she has also been the Stanley Knowles Visiting Professor in Canadian Studies at the University of Waterloo. She was one of the founders of the En'owkin International School of Writing in Penticton, BC (1981); a learning institute with an Indigenous Fine Arts Program and an Okanagon Language Program. In 2001, Maracle was appointed Distinguished Visiting Professor of Canadian Culture at Western Washington University to engage in activities focused on promoting Canadian culture and awareness. She is a member of the Red Power Movement and Liberation Support Movement. Maracle has been the Traditional Cultural Director of The Centre for Indigenous Theatre and has worked as an instructor of dramatic composition and theatrical representation. Maracle's works reflect her antipathy toward racism, sexism, and white cultural domination.

Books by Lee Maracle:

Maracle, Lee. Bent box
Penticton, B.C. : Theytus Books, 2000.
Genre: Poetry
Description: 128 p. ; p., 23 cm.
Audience: Adult
ISBN: 0919441890
Maracle, Lee. Daughters are Forever
Vancouver, BC : Raincoast Books, 2002.
Genre: Fiction
Description: 250 pages
This novel depicts the transformation of a Salish woman who feels alienated from her culture and family. She heals herself by rediscovering her roots and culture and by reconciling with her daughters.
Audience: Adult
ISBN: 1551924102
Maracle, Lee. I am woman : a native perspective on sociology and feminism
Vancouver, B.C. : Press Gang Publishers, 1996.
Genre: Biography
Description: 142 p. ; 22 cm.
Indian women--British Columbia--Biography.
ISBN: 0889740593
Maracle, Lee. Ravensong
Vancouver, B.C : Press Gang Publishers, 1995.
Genre: Fiction
Description: A novel set in a Native community of the Pacific Northwest in the 1950's.
Audience: All Ages
ISBN: 0889740445
Maracle, Lee. Sojourner's Truth.
Vancouver : Press Gang , 1990.
Genre: Short Stories
Maracle, Lee. Sundogs : a novel
Penticton, B.C. : Theytus Books, 1992.
Genre: Fiction
Description: 214 p. ; 21 cm.
Audience: Adult
Maracle, Lee. Will's Garden
Pentictan, BC : Theytus Books, 2002.
Genre: Fiction
Description: 7.7 x 5.1 x 0.5 inches; 224 pages
People and Places--Mutlicultural Stories--Native People (Canada)
Audience: Youth
ISBN: 1894778022

123 Book Tag

2006-12-19T15:18:00.000-08:00

Since it was Kara who tagged me I just had to play along and this tied in to her post about picking up a book randomly and reading the first thing you see while remaining open to the lessons it holds for you whether you like them or not. I had The Essential Rumi on my desk to choose a quote from for the new writing book I start every year and figured I would just roll them all into one...
Here are the 'rules'...

Here's the idea :
Find the nearest book.
Name the book
The author
Turn to page 123
Go to the fifth sentence on the page
Copy out the next three sentences and post to your blog. Tag three more folks.

There are only 5 lines on page 123...

Are you jealous of the ocean's generosity?
Why would you refuse to give
this joy to anyone?

Fish don't hold the sacred liquid in cups!
They swim in the huge fluid freedom.

As I had this song stuck in my head ALL day on my birthday the above was too fitting...

"Swandive"

cradling the softest, warmest part of you in my hand
feels like a little baby bird fallen from the nest
i think that your body is something i understand
i think that i'm happy, i think that i'm blessed

i've got a lack of inhibition
i've got a loss of perspective
i've had a little bit to drink
and it's making me think
that i can jump ship and swim
that the ocean will hold me
that there's got to be more
than this boat i'm in

'cuz they can call me crazy if i fail
all the chance that i need
is one-in-a-million
and they can call me brilliant
if i succeed
gravity is nothing to me, moving at the speed of sound
i'm just going to get my feet wet
until i drown

and i teeter between tired
and really, really tired
im wiped and im wired but i guess its just as well
because i built my own empire
out of car tires and chicken wire
and i'm queen of my own compost heap
and i'm getting used to the smell

and i've got a lack of information
but i got a little revelation
and i'm climbing up on the railing
trying not to look down
i'm going to do my best swan dive
in the shark-infested waters
i'm gonna pull out my tampon
and start splashing around

'cuz i don't care if they eat me alive
i've got better thing to do than survive
i've got a memory of your warm skin in my hand
and i've got a vision of blue sky and dry land

i'm cradling the hardest, heaviest part of me in my hand
the ship is pitching and heaving, my limbs are bobbing and weaving
and i think this is what i understand
i just need a little vaccination for my far-away vacation
i'm going to go ahead boldly because a little bird told me
that jumping is easy, that falling is fun
up until you hit the sidewalk, shivering, stunned

and they can call me crazy if i fail
all the chance that i need
is one-in-a-million
and they can call me brilliant
if i succeed
gravity is nothing to me
moving at the speed of sound
i'm just gonna get my feet wet
until i drown...

I still dont know about this tagging thing though....I still havent really ventured out into blogland and it is too late to start tonight. I will come back to it though I have a few people in mind...is that cheating?

Mr. Marley on life

2006-12-16T03:36:00.000-08:00

Life and Jah are one in the same.
Jah is the gift of existence.
I am in some way eternal, I
will never be duplicated.
The sigularity of every man and woman is Jah's gift. What we struggle to make of it is our sole gift to Jah. The process of that struggle becomes, in time, the Truth.

Bob Marley

Quote of the Now

2006-12-15T10:00:00.000-08:00

I havent been finding the time to write here and at my other blog daily though I have lots I want to add here it will have to wait a little longer. I have such an absurdly large collection of quotations that I can definitley manage to post one a day though. Here's one from Henry Rollins anarchist wordsmith extrodinaire, I think this one is pretty relevant for this indulgent time of year...

Go without a coat when it's cold; find out what cold is. Go hungry; keep your existence lean. Wear away the fat, get down to the lean tissue and see what it's all about. The only time you define your character is when you go without. In times of hardship, you find out what you're made of and what you're capable of. If you're never tested, you'll never define your character.
- Henry Rollins

following bliss poetically

2006-12-11T22:49:00.000-08:00

I wrote this the night before reading a post about following your bliss
which I have also written on @ the centre
I thought I would post it over here instead...just for variety.

In Sointu-Finnish phrase meaning within the clear note of harmony
Sointu-Tone n Finnish
Sointula-Place of Harmony n Finnish

i am a circle barely 24 years round
my history like a stone in the pocket of my life
nearly worn smooth with the ceaseless rubbing of passing days
i pile the time on my face and hands
each passing moment leaving it's name upon my skin
memories printed with indelible ink
a patchwork mosaic of loves and losses
mapping dusks and dawns
my testament to change
holy words written
in every curve and line
beyond the more obvious trappings of skin and bone
beats a passionate tatoo
rythym pulsing in communion
singing a warriors song of rebellion
sounding a long sighing cry in praise of
all creation

i am trying to live within that thrumming sound
that bell bright ringing
a redemptive calling me
to arms
open wide
seeking that perfect note
in sointu
in sointula
within a song of harmony

Ani Appreciation Day

2006-12-10T15:48:00.000-08:00

Let's have a moment of Ani appreciation who has yet to give up or in, but just keeps pushing on and out and over. Three cheers for heroes and rebels in these sanitized times. Remember: "when freedom is outlawed only outlaws will be free."-Tom Robbins

self evident

yes,
us people are just poems
we're 90% metaphor
with a leanness of meaning
approaching hyper-distillation
and once upon a time
we were moonshine
rushing down the throat of a giraffe
yes, rushing down the long hallway
despite what the p.a. announcement says
yes, rushing down the long stairs
with the whiskey of eternity
fermented and distilled
to eighteen minutes
burning down our throats
down the hall
down the stairs
in a building so tall
that it will always be there
yes, it's part of a pair
there on the bow of noah's ark
the most prestigious couple
just kickin back parked
against a perfectly blue sky
on a morning beatific
in its indian summer breeze
on the day that america
fell to its knees
after strutting around for a century
without saying thank you
or please

and the shock was subsonic
and the smoke was deafening
between the setup and the punch line
cuz we were all on time for work that day
we all boarded that plane for to fly
and then while the fires were raging
we all climbed up on the windowsill
and then we all held hands
and jumped into the sky

and every borough looked up when it heard the first blast
and then every dumb action movie was summarily surpassed
and the exodus uptown by foot and motorcar
looked more like war than anything i've seen so far
so far
so far
so fierce and ingenious
a poetic specter so far gone
that every jackass newscaster was struck dumb and stumbling
over 'oh my god' and 'this is unbelievable' and on and on
and i'll tell you what, while we're at it
you can keep the pentagon
keep the propaganda
keep each and every tv
that's been trying to convince me
to participate
in some prep school punk's plan to perpetuate retribution
perpetuate retribution
even as the blue toxic smoke of our lesson in retribution
is still hanging in the air
and there's ash on our shoes
and there's ash in our hair
and there's a fine silt on every mantle
from hell's kitchen to brooklyn
and the streets are full of stories
sudden twists and near misses
and soon every open bar is crammed to the rafters
with tales of narrowly averted disasters
and the whiskey is flowin
like never before
as all over the country
folks just shake their heads
and pour

so here's a toast to all the folks who live in palestine
afghanistan
iraq

el salvador

here's a toast to the folks living on the pine ridge reservation
under the stone cold gaze of mt. rushmore

here's a toast to all those nurses and doctors
who daily provide women with a choice
who stand down a threat the size of oklahoma city
just to listen to a young woman's voice

here's a toast to all the folks on death row right now
awaiting the executioner's guillotine
who are shackled there with dread and can only escape into their heads
to find peace in the form of a dream

cuz take away our playstations
and we are a third world nation
under the thumb of some blue blood royal son
who stole the oval office and that phony election
i mean
it don't take a weatherman
to look around and see the weather
jeb said he'd deliver florida, folks
and boy did he ever

and we hold these truths to be self evident:
#1 george w. bush is not president
#2 america is not a true democracy
#3 the media is not fooling me
cuz i am a poem heeding hyper-distillation
i've got no room for a lie so verbose
i'm looking out over my whole human family
and i'm raising my glass in a toast

here's to our last drink of fossil fuels
let us vow to get off of this sauce
shoo away the swarms of commuter planes
and find that train ticket we lost
cuz once upon a time the line followed the river
and peeked into all the backyards
and the laundry was waving
the graffiti was teasing us
from brick walls and bridges
we were rolling over ridges
through valleys
under stars
i dream of touring like duke ellington
in my own railroad car
i dream of waiting on the tall blonde wooden benches
in a grand station aglow with grace
and then standing out on the platform
and feeling the air on my face

give back the night its distant whistle
give the darkness back its soul
give the big oil companies the finger finally
and relearn how to rock-n-roll
yes, the lessons are all around us and a change is waiting there
so it's time to pick through the rubble, clean the streets
and clear the air
get our government to pull its big dick out of the sand
of someone else's desert
put it back in its pants
and quit the hypocritical chants of
freedom forever

cuz when one lone phone rang
in two thousand and one
at ten after nine
on nine one one
which is the number we all called
when that lone phone rang right off the wall
right off our desk and down the long hall
down the long stairs
in a building so tall
that the whole world turned
just to watch it fall

and while we're at it
remember the first time around?
the bomb?
the ryder truck?
the parking garage?
the princess that didn't even feel the pea?
remember joking around in our apartment on avenue D?

can you imagine how many paper coffee cups would have to change their design
following a fantastical reversal of the new york skyline?!

it was a joke, of course
it was a joke
at the time
and that was just a few years ago
so let the record show
that the FBI was all over that case
that the plot was obvious and in everybody's face
and scoping that scene
religiously
the CIA
or is it KGB?
committing countless crimes against humanity
with this kind of eventuality
as its excuse
for abuse after expensive abuse
and it didn't have a clue
look, another window to see through
way up here
on the 104th floor
look
another key
another door
10% literal
90% metaphor
3000 some poems disguised as people
on an almost too perfect day
should be more than pawns
in some asshole's passion play
so now it's your job
and it's my job
to make it that way
to make sure they didn't die in vain
sshhhhhh....
baby listen
hear the train?

The Gospel According to Shug

2006-12-07T11:47:00.000-08:00

While my faith has no words except that which echo the teachings of my soul, this is as close to a personal manifesto/mantra of any I have ever found. My bible so to speak. I first read the Temple of My Familiar when I was 11 and understood little of what was being communicated to me. Funny how the philosophy below is one I have come to in the intervening time on my own terms and in my own words, I just reread the book for the 2nd time last month. I reprint this here in the hopes that others are as moved as I am...if we all had these words written in our mind's eye what an incredible world this could be. My only change would be to the last statement...I always read it as "helped are those who know they do not know" in true socrates fashion.

The Gospel According to Shug
by Alice Walker

Helped are those who are enemies of their own racism; they shall live in harmony with the citizens of this world, and not with those of their ancestors, which have passed away, and which they shall never see again.

Helped are those born from love: conceived in their father's tenderness and their mother's orgasm, for they shall be those - numbers of whom will be called "illegitimate" whose spirits shall know no boundaries, even between heaven and earth, and whose eyes shall reveal the spark of the love that was their own creation. They shall know joy equal to their suffering and they will lead multitudes into dancing and Peace.

Helped are those too busy living to respond when they are wrongfully attacked: on their walks they shall find mysteries so intriguing as to distract them from every blow.

Helped are those who find something in Creation to admire each and every hour. Their days will overflow with beauty and the darkest dungeon will offer gifts.

Helped are those who receive only to give; always in their house will be the circular energy of generosity; and in their hearts a beginning of new age on Earth: when no keys will be needed to unlock the heart and no locks will be needed on the doors.

Helped are those who love the stranger; in this they reflect the heart of the Creator and that of the Mother.

Helped are those who are content to be themselves; they will never lack mystery in their lives and the joys of self-discovery will be constant.

Helped are those who love the entire cosmos rather than their own tiny country, city, or farm, for to them will be shown the unbroken web of life and the meaning of infinity.

Helped are those who live in quietness, knowing neither brand name nor fad; they shall live every day as if in eternity, and each moment shall be full as it is long.

Helped are those who love others unsplit off from their faults; to them will be given clarity of vision.

Helped are those who create anything at all, for they shall relive the thrill of their own conception, and realize a partnership in the creation of the Universe that keeps them responsible and cheerful.

Helped are those who love the Earth, their mother, and who willingly suffer that she may no die; in their grief over her pain they will weep rivers of blood, and in their joy in her lively response to love, they will converse with trees.

Helped are those whose every act is a prayer for harmony in the Universe, for they are the restorers of balance to our planet. To them will be given the insight that every good act done anywhere in the cosmos welcomes the life of an animal or a child.

Helped are those who risk themselves for others' sakes; to them will be given increasing opportunities for ever greater risks. Theirs will be a vision of the world in which no one's gift is despised or lost.

Helped are those who strive to give up their anger; their reward will be that in any confrontation their first thoughts will never be of violence or war.

Helped are those whose every act is a prayer for peace; on them depends the future of the world.

Helped are those who forgive; their reward shall be forgetfulness of every evil done to them. It will be in their power, therefore, to envision the new Earth.

Helped are those who are shown the existence of the Creator's magic in the Universe, they shall experience delight and astonishment without ceasing.

Helped are those who laugh with a pure heart; theirs will be the company of the jolly righteous.

Helped are those who love all the colors of all the human beings, as they love all the colors of animals and plants; none of their children, nor any of their ancestors, nor any parts of themselves, shall be hidden from them.

Helped are those who love the lesbian, the gay, and the straight, as they love the sun, the moon, and the stars. None of their children, nor any of their ancestors, nor any parts of themselves, shall be hidden from them.

Helped are those who love the broken and the whole; none of their children, nor any of their ancestors, nor any of themselves shall be despised.

Helped are those who do not join mobs; theirs shall be the understanding that to attack in anger is to murder in confusion.

Helped are those who find the courage to do at least one small thing each day to help the existence of another - plant, animal, river, or other human being. They shall be joined by a multitude of the timid.

Helped are those who lose their fear of death; theirs is the power to envision the future in a blade of grass.

Helped are those who love and actively support the diversity of life; they shall be secure in their differentness.

Helped are those who know.

From The Temple of My Familiar.

Oh The Places You’ll Go!

2006-11-29T10:43:00.000-08:00

Here is a little heart warming inspiration for a cold day. My personal mantra.

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You're on your own.
And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets.
Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say,
"I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.
And you may not find any you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you'll head straight out of town.

It's opener there in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen, don't worry.
Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.

Oh the places you’ll go!

You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.
You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

except when you don' t because sometimes you won't

I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, it's true
Bang-Ups and Hang-ups can happen to you.
You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on. You'll be left in a Lurch.
You'll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then, that you'll be in a Slump.
And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both you elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters?
Or, maybe, not quite?

Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.

The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a sting of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.

NO!
That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. there are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame! You'll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't.
Because, sometimes, they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike
and I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

---Dr. Seuss

Demian-Herman Hesse

2006-11-28T22:33:00.000-08:00

"I wanted only to try to live in accord with
the promptings which came from my true self.
Why was that so very difficult?"

So marks the first page of Demian, a deceptively small book carrying a great depth within it's 141 pages. It is not a new story, the central character seeks to break away from his pure childhood world of light and is pulled into the seedy world of sin and avarice. The book is about his struggle to balance the two and to find a worldview that can encompass both aspects of life rather then simply one polarity over another. Among the misleadingly banal story line of boy leaves home, goes to school, rebels, transcends, there is this byplay of truly profound sentences and lessons that led me on a powerful late night journey within myself. The book left me feeling refreshed and less burdened, less isolated in my removal from the trappings of culture and superficiality. I sighed a long "aahhh that's it" from start to finish.

"To the few experiences which have helped me along the way toward my life's true goal I added this new one:...the surrender to Nature's irrational, strangely confused formations produces in us a feeling of inner harmony with the force responsible for these phenomena. We soon fall prey to the temptation of thinking of them as being our own moods, our own creations, and see the boundaries seperating us from Nature begin to quiver and dissolve. We become aquainted with that state of mind in which we are unable to decide whether the images on our retina are the result of impressions coming from without or within. Nowhere as in this excercise can we discover so easily and simply to what extent we are creative, to what extent our soul partakes of the constant creation of the world. For it is the same indivisible divinity that is active through us and in Nature, and if the outside world were to be destroyed, a single one of us would be capable of rebuilding it: mountain and stream, tree and leaf, root and flower, yes, every natural form is latent within us, originates in the soul whose essence is eternity, whose essence we cannot know but which most often intimates itself to us as the power to love and create" (pg. 88).

Hesse wrote this in 1925 but could not have possibly more accurately described the pseudo-alive tv culture of the present had he possesed a time machine:

"The things we see are the same things that are within us. There is no reality except the one contained within...That is why so many people live such an unreal life. They take images outside them for reality and never allow the world within to assert itself" (pg. 96).

I did not expect to find in this book the depth with which I was suprised. The total non-conformity of it, defiant and triumphant and so very much why I am in this place in this now! Made me want to dance and sing with feeling a little less alone:

"I did not exist to write poems, to preach or to paint, neither I nor anyone else. All of that was incidental. Each man had only one genuine vocation- to find the way to himself...to discover his own destiny-not an arbitrary one-and live it out wholly and resolutely within himself. Everything else was only a would be existence, an attempt at evasion, a flight back to the ideals of the masses, conformity and fear of one's own inwardness...I was an experiement on the part of Nature, a gamble within the unknown, perhaps for a new purpose, perhaps for nothing, and my only task was to allow this game on the part of the primeval depths to take it's course, to feel it's will within mine and make it wholly mine. That or nothing!"

His utter contempt and dismismal of the bawdy, gaudy youth of the time fits my own distaste of the wastage of so much vitality in uselessness and indolence. Go watch the video of the Iraqi children running after a container of bottled ameriKKKan water on my other blog the-centre-cannot-hold and think on indulgence. I did.

"Clouds of tobacco smoke drifted out open windows with profusion of song, loud, rythmic yet uninspired, lifelessly uniform [techno anyone?]...out of two bars the methodically rehearsed gaiety of youth rang out against the night. False communion everywhere, everywhere shedding the responsibility of fate, flight to the herd for warmth" (pg. 112-3)

Yet he makes me feel less stigmatized by my own otherness, my lack of complicity, my struggle to find a place I can breathe. By breathe I mean not only inhale/exhale of clean purified air with all that entails but unrestrained, wholly myself surrounded by others who are wholly themselves united by the most sacred and primeval bond of all, survival. To protect our children and all that we love, which is everything, life itself. Hesse speaks of it as a "mark" not a physical scar or defect but a fundamental differentness that is unmistakable.

"We who wore the sign might justly be considered "odd" by the world; yes, even crazy, and dangerous. We were aware or in the process of becoming aware and our striving was directed toward achieving a more and more complete state of awareness while the striving of the others was a quest aimed at binding their opinions, ideals, duties, their lives and fortunes more and more closely to those of the herd. There, too, was striving, there, too, were power and greatness. But whereas we, who were marked, believed that we represented the will of Nature to something new, to the individualism of the future, the others sought to perpetuate the status quo. Humanity-which they loved as we did-was for them something complete that must be maintained and protected. For us, humanity was a distant goal toward which all men were moving, whose image no one knew, whose laws were nowhere written down" (pg. 122)

Those last 11 words are the sweetest poetry to me, I want to curl up in them, linger. The whole passage speaks to my spirituality of evolution and my worry about the evolutionary paths we walk now.

Well what are you waiting for haven't you read it already:)

Other People's Words

2006-11-23T14:00:00.001-08:00

A slideshow of some excellent quote. I especially like the Hunter Thompson and Haile Selassie ones.

my library thing

2006-11-20T15:45:00.000-08:00

I found this great techno widget thing on a friends blog that allows me to catalog all my books online with pictures and links. I am lucky I found it when I did as I had planned on typing it all up. Sigh, one more website to drop minutes into. You can browse through my books by clicking on the "my library" link on the right.

Unsucessful first review

2006-11-19T20:48:00.000-08:00

Well I wrote this well researched 3,500 word review of The End Of Food only to have the computer freeze and loose the whole damn thing. That's why I prefer pen and paper, no freezes, crashes, whirring or other assorted annoyances. So my first review is going to have to wait until tomorrow when I am not so pissed off and tired of typing;) For those interested in such things I am simultaneously reading Timothy Leary's Confessions of A Hope Fiend, a fiendishly (haha) funny and engrossing account of escape from an american jail, flight to Algeria in exile with black panthers and a suprisingly small amount of drug related rhetoric. A hell of a lot better then the last book he wrote called Design for Dying which I bought when I was 13. It's all about him getting cryogenically preserved and revieved at some point in the distant future. Suposedly when we've figured our shit out and created a utopia where a strange brand of hippie/yippie socialism, LSD and technology blend. Yikes. Count me out. I like my utopia straight, no chaser.
till next time
j

Sointula-Island Utopia

2006-11-17T01:08:00.000-08:00

An excerpt from:
Sointula- Island Utopia: The story of Canada's socialist-utopian community.
by Paula Wild

Looking For a Better Life
THROUGHOUT THE AGES, A DESIRE FOR A SENSE of self and a sense of place has motivated the human race to
search for a better life. The sixteenth century writer and philosopher, Sir Thomas More, defined this yearning in his
book Utopia. More chose the word "utopia" to signify a point midway between outopia (no place) and
eutopia (the good place). Thus the word utopia refers not to a specific location, but to an ideal state where
harmony exists between individuals as well as between society and nature.
More's concept of utopia was based on the belief that people were capable of creating their own destinies. He placed
his utopia on an island shaped like a crescent moon [J: as is Malcolm Island!}.
Public lectures were held daily and intellectual pursuits, music and conversation were highly regarded. Fundamental
principles included communal property, labour and dining. More believed that "Each meal taken together stands for
the triumph of justice and represents the equality and communion of all citizens." Later utopian concepts often
included celibacy or free love, and placed an emphasis on physical labour and exercise.
Utopias require physical and social boundaries. A conscious effort is made to separate from mainstream society and
to establish a private place removed from outside influences. Utopians value their coherence as a group, and what
takes place within the community is sharply differentiated from what happens outside of it. Utopia provides an escape from the past, and the promise of a future where meaningful lives are
more important than material wealth.
Since More's time, utopias have appeared on a regular basis. They were particularly popular around the turn of the
nineteenth century, when they were seen as a practical and adventuresome alternative to the upheaval caused by the
industrial and urban revolutions in Europe. North America, with its vast lands and flexible social structures, seemed to
present unlimited possibilities. As the most western province of Canada, British Columbia was a magnet for a variety
of dreamers, idealists and utopians. Religious sects such as the Doukhobors and Mennonites settled in isolated
pockets on the mainland, while small groups of Norwegians and Danes attempted to establish communities in the
Bella Coola Valley and Cape Scott on north Vancouver Island.
Islands, with natural boundaries that favour refuge and retreat, have been favourite locations for utopian communities.
Nestled between the mainland and the northern end of Vancouver Island, Malcolm Island has been the site of several
utopian ventures. Since the late 1800s people of all ages, nationalities and occupations have moved to the island in
search of a better life. An English religious group, socialist Finns, and disillusioned North Americans form the
backbone of Malcolm Island's utopian heritage, but it is the Finns who have most clearly impressed their character on
the island. Like many experimental communities, the Finns' official utopia failed. For most idealistic colonies, the end
of the communal effort was the end of the dream. But the Finns were more persistent. A group of them remained on
Malcolm Island to forge a viable community that still thrives today.
Unlike traditional west coast settlements, the people came to Malcolm Island first, before the industry. Arvo Tynjala,
an early member of the Finnish utopian commune on the island, summed it up: "Most communities, whatever they
are - little towns or villages - they're usually formed around some kind of industrial development, either a logging
camp, a pulp-mill, or a sawmill. But in Sointula it was different. The people went there on their own and then started to
build the community. It took some courage you know, to go into the wilderness and build a community without any
help."

In the beginning

2006-11-17T00:20:00.000-08:00

I am wary of entering this world of data and bytes with it's endless streaming code and utter intangibility. I would rather carry on grand correspondence of the Nick Bantock variety with friends flug far and wide. Unfortunatley while I would be happy to never answer a telephone or email again, preferring face to face engagement or the loveliness of a handwritten letter amongst the usual deluge of bills to this impersonal hunk of plastic and wire, most of my generation is caught hook, line and sinker by the flickering screen of modernity. Even I in hot pursuit of the simple good life out here in the wilds of the pacific northwest am tied to the pulsing umbilical cord of the information superhighway. I must admit this computer and I have come along way together and have accomplished a great deal with just our two brains one digital, one analog. Together we brought over 100 children and counsellors together for a week of camp and celebration, gathered 1500 people in a community park, advertised shows, and reached across space and time to make connections that sometimes altered the course of my life. Perhaps this will be another beginning for us. I intend to use this space to review, recommend and ramble about all things written. I have been reading at least 2-300 pages a day for as long as I can remember. I generally average a book a day on subjects ranging from the evolution of rational thought, teaching as a subversive activity to Piers Anthony. While my tastes in all things bookish are eclectic at best my reading generally falls into two categories: words that enable me to step outside of the constant looming presence of contemporary society and those that allow me to understand the immense destructive force of modernity and provide me with some solutions as to what the hell to do about it. These two categories are all encompassing and are not rigidly defined. I live in what is known in Sointula as the "Freeman Farmhouse" we rent from the Freeman's who live abroad with apparently no intention of returning. Our house came equipped with a generous supply of dirt and cobwebs and the most miraculous library I have ever encountered. After 4 straight months of cleaning, spackling and painting this house we finally finished the library last weekend. We took every book off the floor to ceiling book shelves and gave it the love it so desperatley needed then put it back in true bibliophile style...compulsively. My partner finally left me to it after I kept moving the books he was putting away into formations more pleasing to my eye but unnoticible to saner creatures. There is easily almost 500 books on every imaginable topic of interest. The Freeman's taste in books mirrors my own scarily and when we unpacked our own books we discovered a remarkable amount of doubles. My intention is to read them all, probably twice and since many are rare, random and wonderful I want to open up discussion about them in one of the few forums available to me, isolated geographically from my peers as I am, in the heretofore avoided land of blog. I will begin tomorrow with some thoughts on a few books I finished recently and two I am currently engrossed in: "The End of Food-How the Food Industry is Destroying our Food Suppy-and What We CAn Do About It" by Thomas Pawlick (Greystone Publishers 2006) and "Living The Good Life-How to live sanely and simply in a troubled world" by Helen and Scott Nearing first published in 1953 and more relevant today then it was then. My bed is whispering to me and it is time to put this beast to sleep until tomorrow. shalom enshallah amen peace, god willing, so be it